I Wish – Chapter 14

Tuesday June 5, 2012
Los Angeles, CA

Niall groaned as Brittany rocked her hips on top of him. She moved so steadily and perfectly, it was hard for him to keep his eyes off her. Her hair bounced and looked golden in the light. Her lips were so pink and soft looking, and Niall longed to kiss them.

He tried to move upwards to do so, but she pressed her hands against his chest instead and moved quicker. She shook her head slightly, not giving him the satisfaction. He continued to look up at her in awe and she moved up and down, driving him crazy.

Finally, he rested his hands on her hips and let them linger there. He dug his fingers into her skin and she cried out. Her movements became rougher, and Niall could barely contain himself. She was making him feel so good.

“Brittany…” he moaned, biting his lip slightly. “Don’t stop, baby…”

She tightened herself around him, and he couldn’t hold on any longer. A wave of pleasure crashed through his body. Brittany continued to ride him as he squeezed his eyes shut…

And then they opened.

For a couple seconds, Niall wasn’t sure where exactly he was. His heart was still pounding and he was drenched in sweat. He glanced around, realizing he was alone in his hotel room. He groaned, flopping back down on the pillows. It had been a long time since he’d had a dream with such results.

He just thanked God he hadn’t been on the bus in his bunk when it had happened.

Throwing the covers off himself, he trudged out of bed and headed towards the bathroom. He certainly wasn’t going to be able to go back to sleep now. He tossed his underwear into the corner and turned the shower on.

He let the hot water run over his body for a minute and leaned back against the shower wall. There were times that he wanted to hug Brittany, tell her how beautiful she was and kiss her lovingly for hours on end.

Other times, he wanted to push her down on his bed and fuck her brains out.

Obviously, judging by the events of that morning, today was going to be a day of wishing for the latter. He sighed as he washed himself. He really needed to get laid. Maybe that would subside his fantasies for a little while.

And while he proceeded to finish showering and get dressed, he thought about how he might accomplish that. Staying in LA meant they were kept under tight supervision, and he wasn’t old enough to go to the clubs to drink.

He supposed he could pick up one of the girls that were always hanging around, but that wasn’t a great idea. Any time he’d ever done that before he’d gotten in a ton of trouble the next morning from management. They’d all been told to cool it on the groupies, especially while they were in the US.

He glanced downwards angrily as he arrived at the same conclusion he always did. There would be no way for him to find a suitable girl. Besides, he didn’t just want suitable. He wanted her.

There was a light knock at his door. For the first time that morning, Niall took notice of the time. He realized it wasn’t morning at all – it was half past noon. Even though he’d been so rudely awakened by dream-Brittany, at least he’d been able to sleep in.

When he answered the door, he breathed a small sigh of relief. He didn’t know what he would have done had it been her.

“Hey buddy,” Niall said, smiling a little. “What’s up?”

“The lot of us are going out for lunch… I know you want to join,” he said with a grin.

Niall raised his eyebrow. He really wasn’t in the mood to see Brittany. He didn’t know how he would react around her. Especially since he couldn’t get those images of her out of his head. “Who’s the lot of you?” he asked, walking back into his hotel room.

Liam gave Niall a look and followed him inside. “I don’t know, us lads, Harry will probably bring Brittany…”

Niall sighed to himself. Just as he’d suspected. “I don’t know… I’m not really hungry.”

Liam gave Niall a strange look. He was always hungry. “What?” he asked. “We’re even going to Nando’s… that’s why I said I knew you wanted to come!”

But even the temptation of Nando’s wasn’t enough to make Niall want to put himself in that situation. He needed a little Brittany detox. “Sorry…” Niall said, looking away from Liam. “I think I’ll just order room service.”

Liam couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Are you feeling okay?” he asked, genuinely looking concerned for his friend.

Niall wasn’t about to spill everything to Liam. He wasn’t physically sick… and he couldn’t really lie about that either, seeing as they had recording and things to do that afternoon. “I’m okay, I’m just not up to seeing everyone, you know?”

Liam eyed Niall. He could tell something was wrong, he just wasn’t entirely sure what. It had to be something pretty serious to make him not want to go to Nando’s, after all. “Well… how about the two of us just go out to lunch then?”

Niall considered that for a minute. There would be no harm in that he supposed, even though it would be difficult to explain to the others why he and Liam would be having their own lunch. Especially when Liam didn’t entirely know himself. “Yeah… all right,” he nodded.

Liam grinned and wrapped his arm around Niall’s shoulders as the two of them left the room. “It’s just because you wanted to spend some alone time with me, isn’t it?” he laughed.

Niall jokingly kissed Liam on the cheek. “You know it.”

***

Everyone was waiting downstairs in the lobby when Liam and Niall approached them.

“Ready to go?” Zayn asked, looking at the two of them. “Was Nialler still asleep when you went up there?” he snickered.

“We’re going to go out to lunch on our own,” Liam said, giving their group a slight nod before he and Niall began to walk off.

“Lunch on your own?” Brittany called after them, putting her hands on her hips. “But we’re going to Nando’s!”

Niall didn’t even give her a look. He couldn’t. He wouldn’t let himself. Not after that dream he’d had about her. He shook his head slightly just thinking about it.

“Yup,” Liam said shortly, looking back at her. “See you this afternoon.”

Brittany just stood there dumbfounded with her hands still on her hips. She glanced up at Harry and he shrugged.

“Sometimes they get in a mood,” he explained, taking Brittany’s hand. “Come on, let’s go.”

Brittany just nodded, but couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off.

***

“So, what’s going on, then?” Liam pointedly asked once he and Niall were seated at a different restaurant and had ordered their food.

“What?” Niall asked, giving Liam a look and taking a sip of his water. There was no way he was going to come right out and say it to him. Oh, well I had a sex dream about Brittany, you know, Harry’s girlfriend? I couldn’t look her in the face after what she did to me in my sleep, it was so bad it was worth missing Nando’s for!

There was definitely no way he was going to say any of that. It was better to simply play dumb. But as Liam was still looking at him, waiting for him to finish, he sighed. “I just didn’t feel like going out with everyone.”

But Liam wasn’t about to be fooled. “I’d believe that if you hadn’t been acting weird for the last two days. What’s going on, mate?”

Niall studied Liam for a second and considered telling him. He even opened his mouth, ready to blurt out the words, “I’m in love with Brittany.” But he stopped himself. The more he thought about it, the more foolish it sounded. He hardly knew Brittany at all. How was it possible he had such feelings for her? It had to be more wanting what he couldn’t have syndrome than anything else, didn’t it?

And yet, he knew that wasn’t true at all. He had wanted Brittany before Harry had decided she would be his. He’d just been too slow.

“Nothing,” Niall finally said.

Now it was Liam’s turn to sigh. “Nialler,” he said, “I don’t know why you don’t want to tell me what’s going on, but the lot of us can see that something isn’t right. You haven’t been yourself.”

Niall glanced out he window for a moment as he considered that. Maybe it would help to talk to someone about it. He looked back at Liam, who gave him a slight nod. For a split second, Niall thought that Liam might have figured out it and was just trying to coerce it out of him.

“Is it about a girl?” Liam pressed.

Liam had to have figured it out, Niall was sure of it. “Sort of,” he said. He wasn’t going to give him the answer easily. If he wanted to know, he’d have to work for it.

Liam shrugged. “Well… is it about Holly? Do you miss her again?”

Niall shook his head. No, that definitely wasn’t it. He’d gotten over Holly long ago… he hadn’t even thought about her in quite some time. In fact, Brittany was the first girl since Holly who had caught his attention so strongly. “No, it’s not Holly,” he said, then rethought his decision to tell Liam anything. It was no use and would only cause problems. This was something he should just keep to himself for the time being. “Look, it’s not that serious, I don’t want to -”

“Oh come off it, Nialler,” Liam cut him off. “Don’t shut me out. I’ve seen the way you look at Brittany. I’m one of your best mates, just talk to me.”

Niall shook his head as he threw his hands over his face. Of course Liam wouldn’t let it go. Of course he had to try and get all of the answers out of him. Of course he would just blurt it out when it was clear Niall wasn’t going to tell him himself.

“Sorry,” Liam said quietly. “I just thought you might need someone to talk to. I won’t tell anybody.”

“I’m in love with her,” Niall muttered into his hands. He took a deep breath, because there was no way he was going to let himself cry in the middle of the restaurant. “I’m so in love with her I can’t sleep without dreaming about her, I love being around her, and when I see her with Harry…” his voice began to crack and he drank the rest of his water as he looked at Liam irritably.

“That’s rough,” Liam said sympathetically.

“Yeah,” Niall sighed, leaning back in his chair a little bit. “It is. But what can I do about it?” he asked almost rhetorically. He knew there was nothing he could actually do, and he didn’t expect Liam to tell him to go for it.

Liam shrugged. “I don’t know what to tell you. Normally I’d say that Harry doesn’t hang on to girls too long… but he’s acting strangely with Brittany.”

“I know,” Niall mumbled. “Just my luck.”

“Hang in there,” Liam said with a smile. “It’ll get better. Maybe you just need to find another girl to focus on for a little while?”

“And where would I find one?” Niall asked, rolling his eyes. Being on the road made it so difficult to meet and keep up with anyone. Yet another reason why Brittany would have been so perfect for him.

“I don’t know… but we’re here in the city for a few more days. I’m sure you could find a girl somewhere.”

Niall shrugged. He didn’t really relish the idea of picking up some girl only to have to leave her right away. It wouldn’t solve his problem in the long term.

“Well… you could always get drunk and give Holly a ring at three in the morning,” Liam laughed.

Niall rolled his eyes. “Are you ever going to let that one go?”

Liam continued to laugh, happy he’d lightened the mood a little. “No.”

Niall just shook his head, but he did finally have a small smile on his face. He supposed that in itself was an accomplishment.

“Chin up, mate,” Liam said, as their food was placed in front of them. “It’ll get better.”

Niall wasn’t so sure about that. Still, he had to admit that talking to Liam had made him feel a little better. At least he didn’t feel like such a horrible traitor any longer.

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