“Morons,” Louis muttered to himself as he scrolled through the New York Times app on his phone. It was early, and the sun had just barely risen. Louis wasn’t normally a morning person, but that day he’d found himself awake at the crack of dawn, unable to get back to sleep. So, he’d settled in with a cup of tea and some reading material.

He couldn’t help but feel a little bitter and above the things he read. At one point in his life, Louis had been on top of the world. Well, he and the other four members of their group, really. They’d been number one in dozens of places, headlined sold out arena tours, and drew a massive crowd wherever they went.

Now where were they? Five years later and he sat in his shared lavish penthouse apartment with his boyfriend, drinking tea and shaking his head at the Darwinism of the world.

While the rest of the boys had tried to keep their spirits up as their popularity faded, Louis had found himself growing increasingly more agnostic about the whole thing. They were on top and they could be again. However, it was something that never seemed to matter to the others. They simply wanted to go on making music.

To simply go on and just be was the last thing that Louis wanted. He wanted the stardom and fame. He wanted to be adored once again. He wanted to be relevant.

It was something he was sure the group was capable of. The problem was, the rest of them wanted more for themselves. While Zayn, Niall and Liam had all moved forward with their own lives, Louis wanted to continue moving forward with the group. As far as he was concerned, he still had the energy to do so. There was no logical reason to stop.

It had certainly caused a rift between him and Harry at times. Harry too, wanted the two of them to grow up and move on a little. But Louis was dead set against it, thinking that they could do that while still being in the group. While still being on top.

None of the others agreed with his viewpoint. They were all burnt out, they all needed a break. The price of fame had hit, and had hit them hard. Now, they were finally getting their lives back to themselves.

The problem was, Louis didn’t want his life back to himself. He didn’t like being alone with his thoughts all the time. He had Harry, yes, but he’d come to realize that Harry simply wasn’t enough for him.

He sat there and silently reflected, occasionally muttering a word or two to himself about what he was reading and how much lesser the rest of the population of the world was than him.

***

Harry fumbled with the alarm clock and opened his eyes groggily. He wasn’t used to being up so early, but he’d agreed to meet Liam for breakfast… so early it was.

His eyes shot open when he realized what time it was and he made a mad dash to get ready. If there was one thing he knew Liam hated, it was when he was late. And he was late often. He kept his eyes on the clock and got dressed in a haste, only really stopping to style his hair (because of course, that was important.)

“Morning,” he said quickly to Louis before dashing out the door of their apartment.

He dashed down the street to where he was supposed to meet Liam. Glancing at the clock on his phone, he breathed a small sigh of relief, but didn’t stop running. He only had a few minutes, but at least the cafe was right down the block.

“Did you wake up just ten minutes ago?” Liam chucked when Harry sat down in front of him.

Harry gave him a look, but just chucked in the response. Liam knew him far too well. “Yeah, sorta. It’s too early!”

Liam gave him a sympathetic smile. “Sorry Hazza, but you know how much I love breakfast.”

“Believe me, I know,” mumbled, glancing over the menu. The waitress came by and poured him a cup of coffee, which he quickly fixed with milk and sugar before taking a big sip. “So, you couldn’t drag Nialler out of bed?” he laughed.

Liam gave Harry a look. No, of course he couldn’t dag Niall out of bed. “It’s before noon.”

Harry nodded. “Right.”

“Speaking of the boys… how’re things going with you and Lou?” Liam asked, leaning over towards Harry a little.

Harry bit his lip and tossed the menu he’d been looking at back on the table. He should have known that was why Liam had suggested they go out to eat together – just the two of them. He always had been good at getting the truth out of people.

“You know,” Harry shrugged, trying to play it off. So long as he told himself that things were fine between himself and Louis, maybe one day they really would be again.

“I don’t actually,” Liam said seriously, but quickly softened. “That’s why I asked.”

“He’s just… Louis,” Harry shrugged. “You know how he is. He gets in a mood. It’s not a big deal really.”

“It seems like he’s been in a mood for a little while,” Liam mused, taking a sip of his coffee.

But Harry was determined not to let Liam get to him. It was too early to be having a conversation like this. “It’s nothing, really. He’ll get better eventually. It’s just hard to adjust to things being different.”

“It’s better though, isn’t it?” Liam asked with a smile, looking around. “I mean, we can have breakfast here without getting mobbed.”

Harry glanced around. Yes, he had to agree that was nice. In fact, he knew the only person who didn’t agree was Louis. But that was simply because he loved the attention. He always had. And Harry was naive enough to believe that eventually the attention he gave his boyfriend would be enough.

“Yeah,” he smiled brightly. “It is.”

***

It was only lunch time when Louis heard the key turn in the lock and saw Harry step through the door. He was still sitting in the same spot he had been when he’d left.

“Where’d you head off to in such a hurry?” he asked quizzically. It was rare he ever saw Harry awake that early, much less move so quickly in the morning.

“Breakfast with Liam,” Harry replied, kicking his shoes off and stepping into the kitchen in search of something to drink.

“Just Liam?” Louis asked with a raised eyebrow. Another rarity.

“You know Niall wouldn’t be up this early,” Harry laughed and glanced at the clock. “He’s probably still not awake.”

“Right,” Louis replied, looking back down at his phone. “Did you talk about the new album at all?”

Harry furrowed his eyebrows. “No… it didn’t even come up at all.”

“Well, we should probably get on that,” Louis said seriously, tossing his phone onto the table. He was getting tired of waiting and getting tired of being a nobody.

“Yeah,” Harry said, giving him a look. “We will eventually. Let’s just enjoy the downtime.”

“Hmm,” was all Louis said before getting up from the table. “I’m going out for a bit. Maybe I’ll see a film.”

“I’ll go with you,” Harry offered quickly, looking at him hopefully.

“No,” Louis shook his head as he turned to leave. “I’d rather go alone.”

Harry looked defeated, and for a moment, Louis felt bad. But as he walked down the street he couldn’t help but notice how no one paid him any attention. How it didn’t seem to matter who he was or what he’d accomplished.

Harry walking alongside him wouldn’t fix that. It would only remind him of what he once had, lost, and was desperately craving to regain.